before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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