well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize