Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
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I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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