she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize