i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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