Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
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at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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