Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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