Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
