I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
