I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
