just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
