Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I need to stop coming to work sober
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Randomize
