After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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