I can't watch pbs sober anymore
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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