So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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