I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
This girl is more easily done than said...
is wine microwaveable?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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