do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
