I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
