I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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