Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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