Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
