I met the friendliest cop last night
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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