Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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