My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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