white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
