I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
