So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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