Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
