U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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