he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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