One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
