make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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