we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
