honey bunches of taint.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
