we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
