Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
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i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
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I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
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