It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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