You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
