No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
