Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
