Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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