love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
