Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
