Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
