All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Randomize
