Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Randomize
