I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
