You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
