But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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