Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Randomize