her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
