I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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